Memory and Trauma By Caryl Jones
Have you ever thought about what a memory looks like? Is it like a snapshot, a photograph? Or is it more like a video or movie? I believe it is like a movie. Memories capture the entire context of what is going on, what we are conscious of and what happens at a subconscious level.
This includes memories that have been formed before we even had words to describe them, before we had anyway to explain what happened. This can be seen in the powerful effect of each person’s life experience in the womb, whether good or bad.
Another way to grab the impact of this is to consider your 5 senses. Has hearing a song or smelling a perfume or tasting a certain food ever transported your mind back to a particular time in your life? Maybe to a specific relationship? When that happened did old emotions get stirred up? Did old thought patterns come back as well? That’s the way it is for most of us. Sometimes it is life enriching to remember in this way. And sometimes it can be painful or terrifying.
The human mind was so magnificently created that it tries to protect us from the painful memories. We tend to “block out” unwanted memories or parts of the memories. God put this system in to place to help us as a temporary measure. But, this can be where fear crowds in, magnifying the negative, trying to keep us from turning to God for healing.
Negative memories that have a big impact on us are referred to as trauma. In the books Biblical Foundations of Freedom and In His Own Image, Art Mathias discusses the effect that negative emotions (including trauma) have on the functioning of our bodies and minds. And more importantly, the power of turning to God in forgiveness and repentance. This change in our response to a negative experience brings a change in our memories, a healing; which also brings about healing in our bodies.
It might be hard to believe that you would ever be able to remember that particular time of trauma without pain or negative emotion (like anger, hatred, resentment, sadness, blame, etc.) but you can. Here is a trustworthy saying: God heals a broken heart 100% of the time. I have experienced it; hundreds of others have experienced it; you can experience it too.
There are also memories that don’t exactly register as negative, but can be recognized as trauma. Maybe you say “I only have myself to blame.” These memories can also be healed and you might be surprised at how free you feel, even when you didn’t realize you were bound.
The following is a form of a prayer we often use when praying through a traumatic memory. You’ll see the Wellspring Model in use here. The term “trigger” is referring to those 5 senses discussed earlier – with the intent to release the whole context of the memory, whether someone has words to describe it or not:
Dear Lord Jesus, I choose to forgive (whoever caused it, and whoever (if anyone) could have protected you and didn’t) for (whatever way they hurt you, the specific trauma). I forgive them.
Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me for any anger, resentment, hatred, etc. I have held (toward them or the event). Forgive me for any agreements with fear. (If you are blaming yourself, this is where you choose to forgive yourself and release yourself from guilt and shame.)
In the name of Jesus, by the power of His blood, I cancel satan’s authority over me in this memory. In the name of Jesus I command fear, anger, resentment, etc. to go.
Please fill me with the Holy Spirit. I lift this memory to you, Lord, and ask you to break every trigger from it. Every thought, every emotion, every sensation, every sight, every sound, every flavor and every smell. Please break those triggers and cleanse my heart. In Jesus’ name I command trauma go; I command stress go; I command (any specific fear or self-bitterness) go. Fill me with your healing presence. Touch every cell in by body and set this right. Restore me, fill me with your peace, your love. Please heal my heart and body. Renew my mind and show me your truth about this.